women in science.

As I've mentioned before, there are very few women in my MSE department here at the UW, which just follows the general trend in the STEM (science, technology, engineering and mathematics) fields.

After reading The Disappearing Spoon, (a really good book - I highly recommend it!) I was slightly encouraged about the current status of females in STEM - in the recent past, women did all the work and their male counterparts got all the credit. (This is not a story confined to science, I'm sure.) At least, now women can author papers and are recognized for their work!

However, from all the lecture's I've attended, from the books that I have read, and from my own experiences, I still don't see women as a whole fully supported in STEM. (disclaimer - even though I'm the only women in my research group, I don't perceive any difference in the way I am supported by my advisor.) I don't know what it is going to take to change the fundamental cultural belief that women aren't as capable in the sciences as their male counterparts, just as I don't know what needs to happen to change the perception of scientists as a whole. (I do have some stories to share about my experiences thus far as a female scientist, but I'll save those for another post, this one is already kind of long....) I may be the lone voice here, but sometimes I get frustrated that scientists are presented so one-dimensionally as people who stereotypically lack social skills and don't dress well. I've already ranted about this on my other blog, so I won't repeat it here, but if you're interested, you can read it here.

Someday, I'd like to create a documentary about women in science. I'm sure it's probably been done before, but I'd like to create an exciting, yet holistic, picture of female scientists, not just reproducing the stereotypical perceptions of women in STEM. Recently, I saw a clip for First Robotics filled with celebrities encouraging students to participate in the robotics competition and to pursue science/engineering/math as a career. There was only one female - Miley Cyrus. (I don't have anything against her, but I feel like the editor didn't cut her sections well.) Even the famous scientists they highlighted through the clip were all male. Sure, Albert Einstein was a genius and, arguably, modern science would not be where it is today without his work, but  without the female scientists throughout history, we wouldn't know the structure of DNA or fundamentals of radiation.

{Rosalind Franklin - fundamental DNA structure work via x-ray crystallography}

{Marie Currie - fundamental knowledge of how radiation occurs}

(though I'm sure that if you're reading my blog, you already know about these women :) )

more recently recognized women: 

{Françoise Barré-Sinoussi - fundamental HIV research; Nobel prize 2008}

{Barbara Liskov - (first female US PhD in Computer Science; object-orientated programing}

I did find this video - but let's be real, what was more exciting/inspiring: the video on women in science or the one  with celebs for FIRST? And that was the best looking video I quickly found on YouTube....

So. What can I do now? How can we get more women in STEM? I'm still not sure, but I'm going to do my best to encourage and support every female I work with. I'm headed to NM in a week and a half to give a presentation to underrepresented students in STEM - hopefully my story can encourage them to continue STEM careers.

I've also picked up Right Stuff, Wrong Sex recently from the library, all about the first female astronaut candidate. I can't read it until break, but I'm looking forward to reading it. I'm also on the hunt for other books/media on women in science - so if you have any suggestions, let me know!

(on an slightly unrelated note - I changed my blog theme - what do you think?)

engineering school

according to my good friend Hannah, engineers become engineers to escape writing lots of papers.

apparently, this is not true in my program this quarter. I'm sitting here, in the Suzzallo library, staring down three intense reports that have to be done before the end of the quarter.

Thanks to the SPU/liberal arts/UScholars, I don't mind writing, but I'm not enjoying this paper. I am digging through literature that is older than my grandparents and reading 'reports' that really should be books. (I mean, when has anyone published a 86 page literature paper??!)

I did come across this gem in a footnote about the marcasite form of FeS2:

"I  was prepared  to  have  quantitative  analyses made,  but  our  best professional
analysts  (including  Miss  Mary  G.  Keyes  and  the  new laboratory  for  rock  ahalyses
in  charge  of  Dr.  Grout  of  the  University  of  Minnesota)  declined  to  make  them,
pleading  inadequate  equipment  for  sulfide  analyses. Where  can one obtain  reliable
sulfide analyses? My  own  experience with  the  routine  commercial  analyst  is that  he
cannot  be  relied  upon  for  scientific  work."

I'm also enjoying the fact that this paper is all about politely telling the world that the previous analysis of marcasite by Huggins is wrong and he just got lucky that his mis-labeled axes (is it bad that I had to look up the plural of 'axis'?) actually kind of worked.....

back to the paper.

(somedays I'm thankful we don't see sun everyday in Seattle. too bad today is not one of those days.)

awkward

This morning, I almost had a super awkward experience with one the guy who sits in the desk next me. Instead it was only kind of awkward:

It was before 10am, and as usual, I was the only one in the office. I was really really really tired this morning. My cup of tea got me through the 7:30am bus ride, hour prep for my meeting with my advisor, and finally through said meeting, but I was fading fast post-meeting. So, I figured since I'd be the only one in the office for a bit, I curled up on my chair, which is decently wide, and closed my eyes for ~6 minutes.

unfortunately, my legs like to fall asleep quickly when curled up, and so I decided to move to nap under my desk for 10 minutes.

I only needed a 10 minute power nap.

So, here I was, crawling under my desk, which is decently spacious, and just settling into my nap when I hear the lock turning in my office door.

uh oh. apparently my office-mate decided to show up to school this morning.....
(this is guy who thus far has only ever said "Oh! I didn't know you were that tall!" to me a few weeks ago - he hasn't been in the office very frequently lately)

as quickly and gracefully as I could, I reached for my computer power cord and pretended that I had to be on my hands and knees, completely under my desk, to get it plugged in. Fortunately for me me, the plugins are inconveniently located under my desk in the far corner....but it was already plugged in.....so I pretended that I had just finished plugging it in....

second sentence he ever said to me: "Are you alright?"
"yep, yep" just plugging in my laptop"
third sentence: "there's a strip cord over here you can use if you want."
"it's okay, I've got it figured out, thanks!"
(besides - who knows when I might need that excuse again?)

I crawled out from under my desk and started working again. no nap today.

I'm 99% sure he bought my story.

-----------

tomorrow's a day 'off', but I find this quite appropriate:

you know I'm going to be in tomorrow by 8:30am. 

cômmuter

midterms = no posts for a while.
midterm over = posting again :)
(if you want to know, midterm did not go as well as I would have liked. 1/10 of the points were on a topic I've never studied before, there was no homework covering it and we only spent 10 minutes and one slide on in class on it. we covered 150+ slides.)

my roommate's feelings about my mysterious disappearance into homework/study mode this past week:

you'd think they'd remember being a student! It has only been 5 months!


*warning - this blog post gets a bit nerdier than the past ones*

mainly because I've been charting my average cycling speeds to and from school each day!

see?! my average is increasing! Okay, it's barely increasing, but it's something! Also I find it interesting that the slopes seem to parallel....that probably means that if I factored out the extra speed I get coming down the massive hill right outside my house, I would get roughly equal average speeds each way. hmm.

Buying my new bike was probably the best decision I made about bike commuting - it may still be tough to wake up and get out of the house before the sun rises every morning, but then I get on my bike and remember why I signed up for this :) The hill home is still not fun, but I make it up consistently now. And as pictured in the picture below - I'm getting better at tweaking my bike. I added the back rack all by myself! (Well, I also put on the waterbottle holders and bike lights, but those are easy. Taking apart the brake and pin from the wheel - a bit more tricky for me!)

Second best decision - getting a bike locker. No one knows my bike is locked in it and it stays dry! (well, the asphalt sometimes gets wet from creeping water, but my actual bike stays dry) So, I can bike to school, and if I am too tired, too sore or it gets too late, I can grab a bus home and not worry about my bike. Best ever.

And all the time I spent researching for an excellent pannier has paid off. (I spent close to 2 weeks searching the internet) Mainly, most of the waterproof backpacks and panniers are not very attractive. I don't know who decided that waterproof = poor color choice and only square shaped bags with strangely placed straps, but Knog did not listen to them.   I love love love my Knog Dry Dog pannier!!

(sorry if you don't care about my pannier, but I'm going to write a baby review here because I could only find one online and I think it deserves way more!)

Firstly - the 17" bag is HUGE. Like, super-duper large. I lose things all the time to the bottom of the bag and half the time I stick my head in the bag to find something. It's like a giant black hole. or Mary Poppin's carpet bag - but better, because it's absolutely WATERPROOF.

(it's about as big as my torso!)

The way the Dry Dog closes is one of the best techniques I found online. It may be similar to the Ortlib bag, but not really from what I can tell. Here you roll the top down and then bring the clips together in the middle, which really keeps the water out (and air in if you're not careful!) but then the over-the-top flap is shaped to get envelope the whole opening, doubling the waterproof-security. And it clips down, unlike the ortlib one I was looking at, which used velcro. I love velcro, but I have more faith in clips/snaps. I recently rode through a decent rainstorm and nothing got wet. I was soaking, but my books and computer were dry!

(twist-and-clip)

(even the front stripes are reflective!)

The pannier has a board on the backside and the Klickfix system attaches to it. It also supports your computer, which can hang out in your pannier in the built-in pocket. I still keep my computer in my sleeve when I'm not using it, just for extra protection. The built-in pocket is super padded, but conveniently keeps your laptop out of the way in your bag. And there is a mesh pocket with an elastic top halfway down the front of the computer pocket, which is a great place for keys, headphones, wallet, etc. Otherwise the little items will get lost in the bag!

(easy, yet secure, clip on and clip off)

And, this pannier easily converts to a messenger bag, courtesy of the wide, soft and comfortable strap attached. I use this as my only bag around campus, as it still keeps the rain out when I'm walking! :) It is really easy to adjust the strap length, but if you don't have it at the right height, sometimes the back rack attachements can get caught on your pants, jacket, shirt, etc....

(strap adjustment + reflective half circles on each side!)

Overall - awesome awesome bag and it's totally worth the price and shipping costs! They have a 13" option, but I'm not sure if it comes with the Klickfix system, as they call it a 'bag', not a 'pannier'.

Now all I have to do is figure out how best to dry my bike clothing out on rainy days....I hate wet socks :)



In the meantime, this is what's on my plate for the week - thesis proposal outline + filling it all in.....

....seminars....

One part of grad school I did not expect was the number seminars I have to attend. I'm just shy of three weeks in and I've already listened to 6 seminars and have one more to go this week. (this week is unusual, mainly because my sol-gel class has morphed into guest seminars for both classes this week, so I going to 4 seminars). and last week, I went to a seminar outside of school, as I finally made it one of Seattle's Science Cafes.

This summer, I could go to just one or roughly four different seminars a week, and they usually had cookies aft wards :) I enjoy going to seminars, and as uninteresting as the titles may sound, I've found that I usually find something intriguing in each one. That doesn't always mean that I actually understand much of what is being discussed, but I try to pay close attention...promise.

Anyways, one of our seminars was actually pretty pertinent to what I am planning on researching - solar cells! This professor from the University of Illinois (who is taking a sabbatical in Oregon??) researches something called CIGS - they are a specific type of solar material that is made of Copper, Indium, Gallium, and Selenide (I think) and are becoming more promising with increased efficiencies and lower manufacturing costs. However, I am not a super big fan of the device because it still uses both CdS for an absorber layer, which is toxic (though he did say that should a house burn these panels on the roof, the vapor was not concentrated enough to be toxic) and the cells rely on indium, an element which, to the best of my knowledge, is only available in China. And I heard that recently China's been increasing prices of certain metals, and though I'm not sure if indium is one of them, I wouldn't be surprised. I think every current solar cell uses it in some form. The only major point I disagreed with his assertion that we should only focus on efficiency of the cells and that going for a cheaper, but less efficient material was a good problem for 'academia' but not really commercially feasible. Maybe it's just because that's what my thesis focuses on, and I'm a bit biased, but I think that using a cheaper, less toxic, easier to manufacture material can be a good tradeoff with a decreased efficiency. But we'll see. Ask me again in 5 years how I feel about that :)

Today's substitute sol-gel seminar was barely related to sol-gel processing (actually, I can't really figure a connection) but really interesting. It focused on a new idea for storage of energy generated from solar cells - splitting water. Since solar cells only work during the daylight hours, what happens when you need electricity at night? You can produce more electricity during the day than you use, but if you can't store it, then you lose it. One of my favorite companies, A123 Systems in MI, has developed a more efficient battery that can possibly 'stabilize the grid', basically store excess power and meter it out when needed. But this prof was discussing how if we split water into it's respective H2 and O2 components, then later on we could recombine them and get energy out when they form H2O again. Yes, you'll lose some energy to splitting the original water, but not as much as if you lost all the excess energy by not trying to store it. They are even working on developing solar cells of sorts that can sit in a clear bucket of water and just by absorbing light can power reactions that split water. To cool! Here is a sweet video he showed us, the bubbles on the front are O2 and the ones on the back are H2. There are no wires, no membranes, no nothing besides this complicated, layered metal.

Isn't it pretty?!

The other seminars - not so interesting. I may have found a new technique that will be helpful in determining charge carrier mobility (basically, how far can an electron or electron hole move in my material) but it also looks like a complicated set up :/

One seminar had lots of cool pictures because they were causing supramolecular structures to self-assemble in monolayers - randomly dispersed pieces of a puzzle come together in an ordered/patterned fashion by themselves. And they make really cool SEM pictures:

(the green overlays are the molecule outlines)

All I could think about during the lecture was how they would look really incredible blown up really large or shrunk to a small pattern and used in a dress....like these atomic bomb images were used:

(Christopher Kane's 2010 Resort Collection)

I just calculated that I'm required to go at least 90 seminars so that I can finish my degree. Oh boy.

thoughts, thoughts.

As I was driving over the pass to my hometown today, I had a whole bunch of blog post ideas run through my mind, but in classic form, now that I sit down, I can't really remember them all. Oh well.

Today is Friday. I spent the last two solid days working on one homework assignment. Like 24+ hours on it. Maybe a few projects during undergrad took longer than that, but never in two super-concentrated days. And never just one nine-question homework. The older students warned us that this course would be heavy on the work, but I was not expecting this. I think the extended length of time required was due to the book's extremely concise way of explaining complicated concepts and lack of examples (not good for a visual learner like me). I seriously sat and worked on a jump the book took in the sole example problem for two hours - I just could not figure out where they got the values they were substituting in. My lack of a math background is coming back to get me - the geometry (a course I never actually took) on one problem caused #7 to take me 2+ hours - yikes. I don't know where my prof got his 4-6 hour time required for homework statistic, apparently not from his students....oh well, at least I get to think about crystal structures that produce fluorescent crystals:

{white light}

{UV Light}

But, since I was able to press through most of my homework (I'm still going to have to go back over it Sunday), today was a wonderful day of brain-resting. No more complicated thought than what I tea I needed to pick out at the Asian market - I scored some sweet Tie Kuan Yin and a High Mountain oolong. You've never quite know what you're getting at this market, as you can't smell any of the tea beforehand, nor can I read any of the characters besides the names which, thankfully, are in English. But, my tolerance for 'dirt tea' (how I describe the oolong I picked up last time I was there) has gone way up, so I assume I can drink any oolong I purchase there. So far, the High Mountain was much darker than I expected, at the TeaCup it's a pretty light oolong, but the batch I got was pretty dark. It still tasted good, just more like a Tie Kuan Yin...maybe I just accidentally opened the wrong box??

Side note: I'm finding that as much as I love my electronics and am trying to do everything in the 'cloud' (dropbox is fantastic!), I have yet to find a good replacement for a simple weekly planner that I physically write in. There is just something about actually writing that so far, I've been unable to duplicate electronically....but do any of my friends want to write me an app??? :D or know of a great electronic weekly planner that mimics this?

This week's been kind of slow outside of the marathon hw days; after my group meeting Saturday (more about that later), I had to still write a draft of my technical proposal for my fellowships to submit to my advisor by Monday afternoon, so that took all of Sunday and Monday - it's still surprising to me how long it takes for me write 1000 words that construct a comprehensive yet concise description of my research! And I still haven't heard back yet....I'm kind of dreading this happening:

However, he has been traveling to a conference at the Fetzer Institute, so I guess I can't expect too quick of a response, even though he did say that generally he can read more while he is traveling....I already know that I need to edit/re-structure my draft, so that's on the docket for tomorrow. (anybody feel like peer editing?) Anyways, the Fetzer Institute is a relatively newly funded non-profit that seeks to look at love and forgiveness from a variety of perspectives, including engineering. Some guy named Fetzer passed away and left oodles of money to form this institute, with the sole instructions that whatever they do has to be focused around those themes. They are not a body that accepts grant applications, they just decide to give people money to promote the work they are already involved in. My advisor promised more information once he gets back, I'm interested in hearing where they decided to give money! I'm also interested in watching how this institute develops it's work in the world, because, as far as I can tell, they are a non-religious body. Or maybe an all-religions body, as I think the Dalai Lama and another well-known-guy-whose-name-I-can't-remember are co-hosting their giant conference in a monastery in Italy next year (apparently, before this conference, the chapel they are holding the conference in has never been opened outside of a papal visit). I'm not saying that you can't do work that benefits others apart from Christ, but it looks different, and, I'd posit, maybe not as wholly beneficial as working towards both spiritual and physical wellbeing simultaneously. Thoughts, anyone?

In a year, it will be good to re-read this when I am so frustrated at an experiment (I'm sure it'll happen eventually) that working on homework for 24+ hours will be remembered with fondness.....

Learning to Swim

Grad school quickly is settling into a routine, and I'm finding that I'm busier than I expected to be (not that I should be surprised, but it's been a load of work for only the first couple weeks)

Typically, I've been arriving at school by ~8:30 am every morning. Having four roommates who all have to go to work by 8 or 8:30 helps motivate me to get up. And it's nice to not rush once I'm at school, I can usually get some tea in me before class, which helps wake me up :) (I don't think it's the caffeine, just drinking something warm wakes me up) It's takes me a few minutes to get put together after biking in to school with my bike gear on, but I'm reasonably ready to go by 9 am. I only have one real class each day, but they take up basically all of each morning. (except fridays. I wasn't supposed to have class friday, but one prof decided to make up the days he was missing by holding a 1hr session every Friday morning. Fun.) Apparently, it's normal for my other prof to just keep lecturing past the time our course is supposed to end, as he needs to cancel courses later on in the quarter. He lectures anywhere from 15-30 minutes over the usual course time. While that is not the longest time in the world, for some reason, I just get restless. It could be because the course is just before lunch or the fact that all we do is sit in the dark, scrambling to write everything down our prof is writing on the overhead projector.

Yes. Overhead projector. Apparently the UW still has one of those in almost every room on campus. And  people use them all the time! You have to check out and bring the digital projectors yourself to many classrooms. It's just a funny switch from SPU, where we were apparently down to two overhead projectors on campus. I had one prof from the history department who brought an overhead with him to class frequently :)

My other two classes are just seminars, where I go and listen to a lecture/talk for an hour and then there is a Q&A session afterwards. Really low key, but I'm not gonna lie - sitting and paying even a moderate amount of attention when the topic is nothing I'm really interested in (microfabrication of structures for stem cell cultures?!) is quite difficult. Today's topic: Supramolecular Self-assembly at Surfaces....yeah. May not be the most engaging....

And apparently I missed the memo about grad students not normally getting in to school at 8:30 am, as I'm finding that I'm usually one of the first people there, if not the first. I guess I'm used to it from this summer, where no one came into work before 9 am either... I'm finding that I have more of a 'work' mentality about grad school than a 'school' mentality; it probably helps that I'm am commuting by bike each day, leaving significantly before my class' start time and that I have an 'office'.

This is my desk/office. it includes all the essentials: climbing gear, a couple changes of clothing, a computer (you can't really see it up on top o the books), rain jacket, travel mug and teabags. Currently drinking 'super' Irish breakfast, English breakfast, china oolong, and what I call 'dirt tea' because if you just smell it, it kinda smells like dirt. Kind of tastes like it too, but it grows on you....drinking through 100 teabags will force you to like it. I don't actually know the name beyond 'organic oolong' because the packaging is all in some form of Chinese....

My office is also really really quiet - there are only five of us in the room and frequently I'm the only one here. I'm contemplating trying to move to another one, but it may be complicated (changing keys, making my officemates feel weird, etc. but as I don't really ever see them, I'm not too worried about that...) I may just wait til the quarter break and then see about switching, we'll see. 

I've surprised myself with amount of focus and work I've been able to get done while at school - usually I couldn't do homework on campus at SPU because I got so distracted by people and other commitments. But now I get can things done and by the time 4pm rolls around, I'm exhausted and so ready to go home. Hopefully, I can keep this momentum going, it lessens the amount I have to do back at home. 

----

and you should watch this: 

I laughed so hard I almost cried.

Grad School Adventures

a) I haven't posted here in a while.
b) Mainly, it's because I think most people who read this blog I chat with frequently in person.
c) But, one of my best friends just moved to India for a time and sometimes I forget to tell her things, so this may help keep her up to date :)
d) And to serve as a reminder of what I've been through when the evenings begin to stretch out as I spend inordinate amounts of time on grad school work.

So.

Grad school. It's only been a week and a half - only ~ 258.5 weeks to go. Wow.

Before it all began, I was so excited, nervous, and just ready to start. It was a somewhat surreal process leading up to grad school; I honestly don't know exactly when I decided to go to grad school, I just started applying. And then I just kept moving forward with the process, praying the whole time, and always feeling that I was stepping in the right direction. Some school doors were opened, some schools said 'no', but I surprisingly found my place at the University of Washington (go Huskies!)

I initially only applied to the UW for my mom and dad's sake - I don't know if they ever expressly said as much, but I knew that staying nearer to my hometown would be appreciated :) I, for one, have been itching to leave Washington for as long as I've had a choice, but I keep finding my way back to Seattle. I've fallen in love with Seattle as a city and it's hard to imagine living anywhere else now. As great as U Maryland, Rensselear Polytech, and Georgia Tech were as schools, Seattle rocks. And as a bonus - I get to live with 5 amazing ladies in an incredible home. We're still sorting everything out (aka I have work on my tidiness), but I'm so blessed to live in an encouraging community!

I was so nervous to start coursework, mainly because I had a feeling this my courses were going to significantly more challenging than undergrad and I don't yet know the rules of grad school homework - how much aid with a prof give you? how much is appropriate to ask for? And, with moving schools, I've lost my support group of students in my courses at SPU. After 4 years of almost every single class together, we'd finally become comfortable really working with each other on homework and figuring most things out on our own. I also know my strengths lean more in the conceptual side and less on the mathematics, so I was/am, frankly, terrified about the level of math I'm going to need to know to get through the next five years. One my biggest undergrad regrets is not figuring out early on that I should really really do a math minor if I wanted to have a good technical background for grad school. A Clothing and Textiles minor was enjoyable - I did learn very useful skills and feel my technical level has exponentially increased - I don't think it was the best choice. Oh well, it's in the past now. I guess I'm just going to take the advice of my high school math teacher and when I don't know a concept, I'll go check a book out of the library. or look it up online. or call my engineering friend in NY with a desperate plea for aid....

And yes, coursework is turning out to be difficult, but I'm being forced to learn better time management. I picked up the course pack for my core class about a week before classes started and started thumbing through it. Ten pages in, I found the first homework. and freaked out. Even though I've had quantum mechanics, I knew it had been too long since I attempted any sort of quantum, so I started on my homework a week before classes even began. Yep, I'm that much of a nerd. Seven library books later, my desk is overflowing, but I have been re-learning quantum. I'm still not entirely refreshed on the topics, but I got enough read and worked out that I feel fine about HW #1....kinda.

Okay, this post is getting a bit long - I'll put a break in here and write more later :)

{my office}

(http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=1427)

also - trying out a new theme, not 100% sure I like the bright text on dark backgrounds - let me know if you love/hate it

Off to visit graduate schools!

Over the course of the next month I will be visiting four different graduate schools:

Georgia Tech
UW
Rice
U Maryland

While I'm not sure how I feel about spending that much time in a plane, I am excited to meet potential graduate school advisors and fellow students. This whole process has been one complicated and generally unguided process and I'm just glad to have been accepted to some schools. I don't have a top choice, or even a top three at this point, so don't ask, but I plan on having a sorted list by April 1st!

And then I shall determine where I will spend the next 5-6 years of my life. Wow. This PhD business is actually starting to feel real!!

On a related note, the jacket picture below is one that I had hoped to have completed by the time I left for GA. That is not going to happen - it's not even cut out yet. And, apparently, people don't usually wear suits to these interview shindigs, at least according to my friend James, who had been to three so far. I'll still start with wearing my jacket from H&M, but that gray sateen cotton garment can't even begin to compare to the beautiful green wool-cashmere blend material from England that I bought in the Philippines!